Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

How do I create cinema-grade videos using AI?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

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I know who the president of Turkey really is

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I can count

How many boxes 600 x 400 x 200 go into a 20ft container?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

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If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Is LGBTQ destroying the world?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

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I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

How do you feel about Trump saying Ukraine 'should have never started war with Russia'?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Can men enjoy receiving anal sex?

I have a reading level above third grade

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Who has gotten cured from a stage 4 breast cancer? The oncologist told her she would never be cured.

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I see through liars

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

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I actually pay taxes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

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I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What do you think about Anthony Scaramucci saying that JD in JD Vance stands for "Just Dull?"

I understand how hurricane paths work

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I can read

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy bullshit